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Mum and i are going on a journey togeather of love, life, laughter, tears, cancer and crafts come join us on our journey

Wednesday, 8 June 2011

my journey so far this year (Ema)

In early January I was working as a full time hairdresser and a part time waitress/bar person. My life was very busy and I didn't have much time for me. Then late January my life took a different path. I found a lump in my breast. I thought hmmm and went and showed my mum she said " you better go get that checked" and within a week I knew I had cancer. The day I found out for sure was one of the scariest days of my life and how I dealt with that well mum and I sat outside I cried and drunk 2 bottles of wine and then went for a walk to the beach. I decided that night that I would give myself one day to fall apart and then I would get on with it and fight this thing that was invading me. With in another 2 weeks i had been up to the hospital nearly every day being poked and prodded  and so may people had seen me with my top off that Id just about walk into the room and get my kit of straight  away. Then came surgery, I had a full mastectomy on my right side and all my lymph nodes removed I was in hospital for 3 nights. My mum never left my side she slept on an uncomfortable chair and was at my Beck and call. In the next few days after i got home it was tough I couldn't do much for myself do to the pain meds and the fact I had a drain in for nearly 2 weeks I also could not move my arm very well and it was quite sore. I spent the first week in bed. i had exercise i had to do to strengthen my arm And as i had all my lymph nodes removed I have to be careful that I don't get an infection as I have nothing in my arm to fight it. (this is something I have to watch from now on) so no gardening for me with no gloves on ( what a shame cause I love gardening. Not!)  But I healed quite well and only had to go up to A & E a few times.
my surgeon told me that all the Cancer was gone, YAY!!!!!!!!!

Then I met with my oncologist and was told the next step was chemo to make sure that the caner doesn't come back.  I had to have 2 types of chemo the first lot (which i have finished ) was 2 drugs given by iv every 3 weeks for 4 sessions. So we rock on up for my first chemo 3hours later I'm off home. now the first chemo is a bit trial and error you get drugs to counteract the side effects but each person is different so they arn't really sure what side effects you will get. Then the next time you have chemo they give you pills to counteract the side effects that the first lot of pills give you lol.
My first chemo session was going OK until i ended up in hospital for  5 days in isolation cause I got sick. On chemo the chemo attacks the fast dividing cells which means your immune system has no defence and even someone with a runny nose can put you in hospital.  This time again my mum was right there with me. After 5 days of being in a room isolated its amazing what things you find to entertain yourself, surgical gloves make great balls and make good heads. It was funny I had never before worried about other people and their germs but wow when it can put you in hospital and your aware of it the amount of people who don't wash their hands, scratch their bottom and hand you your coffee or pick their nose then pack your food is crazy.
My next 3 lots of chemo was ok. although by now I feel like a pin cushion i have veins that like to run away and hide and so it takes at least 3 goes to get the iv line in and I also have to have bloods done before chemo to make sure my bloods are up. chemo isn't great each time I was in bed for at least a week with nausea and fatigue and pain and you lose your taste and end up by having a metallic taste in your mouth and its so hard to drink but you have to drink to flush it out. But chemo is going to help me so you gotta do what you gotta do.
So my next lot of chemo I start tomorrow I'm a bit nervous as its new symptoms and this time I have it every week for 12 weeks. But then that is good as well because it will go faster.
I am very lucky i have had the support of my mum, my rock. Every appointment, every check up, every craving I have had for food I thought I wanted and then mum would make or go get it and then I didn't want it everything i needed my mum was there.
How we have got through this we laugh when things get tough we go out and we be silly we tease each other. Mum laughs at my bald head and i laugh at her forget fullness. We laugh when people ask me how I am with their head tilted to the side and I say "I'm great" and the look on their face Is like how can you be so happy?. Every hospital visit we nearly end up in tears cause we are laughing so much. Don't get me wrong I have my bad days but I try not to have them very often cause that's just boring. I am so luck I have meet some amazing people and I am so lucky for the doctors and the treatments that are out there to make me better.  I am thankful for my life and my family. I have learnt not to sweat the small stuff cause really does it matter?

This pic was taken at a place we stayed at in Takaka when we got away for a weekend Just beautiful

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